Refuse to let self doubt ruin you

This week I experienced self-doubt; it threw me off balance and left me quite off center.

Self-doubt once it takes hold, has the ability to bury itself deeply inside you.

Self-doubt can ruin you, if you allow it!

I am not going to lie, my self-doubt episode made me cry. My self-doubt caused me to lay awake that night, feeling inadequate and annoyed.

My self-doubt also allowed me to wake up the next morning, filled with positive determination to get rid of it.

Which is precisely what I did!

I did this, by focussing on positive things, people and comments. I did this by choosing not to dwell on my tiny mistake, but be proactive in finding ways to move forward, to improve, to grow.

I would love to say that my self-doubt will never come back, that I am stronger than that, but that would be a lie, for I am human, and as humans even the strongest of us, fall apart from time to time, and you know what I am ok with that.

Our minds are pretty darn amazing at turning negatives to positives if we keep training them to do so.

Green for goodness

This week I went and got myself a cold; so I have spent my energy (when not resting) in between trying to stop my nose running in down dog and making healthy green concoctions.

I often get asked for recipes so here are a few jam packed with goodness from the last few days.

My get over a cold throw it all in a blender juice:

*orange juice
* handful of spinach
* little bit of ginger
* handful of berries

Delicious and filled with anti-oxidants and vitamin c.

Has to be good for you coz its green – green soup.

This I took from a recipe and as always I started with the recipe then ditched it and made it my own (no offense to all the fabulous people who contribute to recipe books)

This soup consisted of:

* 1 leek
* 2 cloves garlic
* 2 tablespoons olive oil

Heat all this up in a large pot until soft

Then add (I am being non descriptive with the quantities I say use what you have or as much as you like)

* broccoli
*kale
*spinach
*silver beet
* ginger
* 2 ltr vegetable stock

Bring all of this to the boil

Add in
*salt and pepper
* 2 teaspoons lemon rind (I added more and added some lemon juice as well

Cool this all down

The put into blender and add 300g silken tofu

I also added some lime juice and while it strongly resembles baby food in looks, the taste is quite delicious!

Please message me if you would like actual quantities as per the initial recipe:)

Another thing I have been eating lately is avocados on toasted sourdough with lemon, cracked pepper and snow pea sprouts.

All of these things are healthy and quick and easy to make.

Enjoy and please share any of your healthy favorite green tasty delights.

Happy Easter gorgeous bunnies out there

20140421-072200.jpg

I deliberately used the word gorgeous in the title; as I am well aware those of you who have been consuming more delicious chocolate are probably now feeling guilty and anything but gorgeous.

So let’s put a stop to those thoughts right now!

Let’s be human and indulge every now and then.

Let’s enjoy Easter, enjoy a break from work (hopefully) enjoy your life each and every beautiful moment.

Find time after the break to get back to your healthy fitness routine, restore your balance.

20140421-073012.jpg

Through the eyes of your Pilates instructor

How many of you have walked into a Pilates class and thought to yourself – well this is going to be lame?

Come on be honest, I know who you are! I can sniff out the non-believers a mile away 🙂

My husband calls me a sniffer dog; I see and hear everything. Let me tell you, it is a blessing and a curse!

How can such slow controlled movements actually tone my body, improve my flexibility and core strength I hear you say?

Well I am glad you asked!

While the non-believers are busy non-believing I am busy noticing (not in a creepy way) the bodies of many of the Pilates instructors they are lean, toned and healthy looking. That surely is a positive endorsement.

As I teach, I observe, not just to check that people are performing the exercises safely and correctly, but watching human behavior during exercise is fascinating.

I see some  high school girls rolling their eyes and their heads, giving me a little ‘ this is going to be totes lame look’.

I see you, I was that girl once!

I see you lifting your leg up and down, showing off your mad flexibility cheerleader like skills, I see you roll your eyes when I tell you that you don’t need to move that fast, or lift your leg so high.

I make you slow it down, then I smile as I see the effects of the workout done correctly.

Not so totes lame now is it?

I see you, shy girl in the back row, overweight girl in the corner and I smile at you, quietly plodding along, struggling to keep up but doing it correctly and refusing to give up, I see you shy girls, I see you overweight girls and I salute you!

I remember high school, the competitiveness, the need to fit in, the struggle to be part of a group, yet maintain a little piece of independence, to maintain a little piece of you. I remember the ups and down of teenage years.

I see the cool girl now struggling for composure and I feel for her too (I am a ridiculous softy), but at the end of the day, everyone is fighting their own battles, and sometimes that cool exterior is merely a front for some hidden away fears.

I see the older ladies attending week after week, with their dodgy knees, their bung hips and their sore necks. Their bodies may not be what they used to be, but their pelvic floor is strong and their mind power can blow my mind away.

Whether the occasional fart like sound during crunches is the rubber mat beneath them or an actual fart no body cares.

While they might need a little rest in-between exercises, they always give 100%, they are fit, they are slim and they are strong in body and mind, and I am in awe of each and every one of them.  Continuing to move your body as you age, is one of the biggest gifts you can give yourself.

I see you strong muscly six-foot tall guy being dragged in by your girlfriend, I see your cynical look even from my five foot small stance and I have to be honest, I see you and I think – game on!

I give you the hardest options, I know you think it won’t be strong enough for you when you look at my petite frame, but when you collapse on the floor and I am the last man (little tiny Pilates instructor with a core of steel standing) I would be lying if I said I didn’t feel a little smug.

I see my class of predominately non-English speaking people looking up at me, not understanding a word I say, returning week after week and I think how incredibly brave they are.

You see, I see everything and I love what I see.

Those smiling those frowning – smiling through the pain, frowning through the concentration, or frowning at my sometimes non funny – tumbleweed type moment jokes.

pilates blog

I see you holding your breath in, I ask you if you are all breathing, you nod, I know that you’re not breathing properly. I remind you again to breathe, you smile as though as I am crazy – of course I am breathing you think.

Yet I see you concentrating and trying so hard that you hold your breath in, I know this as we finish and I hear the group exhale.

I know this as that large loud exhale fills the room and we all collapse on the floor and laugh.

I see the supersized bodies, the undersized bodies and everything in-between.

I see the looks on your faces as I have suddenly forgotten how to count, I see you leaving with a slight limp as I have got caught up in the moment and have done 12 reps on one side and 25 on the other. during glute exercises.

Joking, or am I?  hehe!

At the end of the day I am human, just like you, I have my good days and my bad days and my somewhat ridiculous days. I have days just like you when you just wake up feeling blah.  We are all human and we feel how we do and I am here to tell you that its ok.

I see those of you attending Pilates for rehab and I know how difficult it is for you. Those simple movements that are no longer so simple to you. The once effortless movements, requiring more effort than you ever dreamt possible. I see you and my heart swells with a mixture of pride and pain for you.

I see you for the simple fact that you are there. You could have given up, but you didn’t. I see you and I am so grateful to be a part of your healing journey.

I see you ALL, because you are there, you are trying, you are moving, you are trying something new or simply trying to improve, and for that alone you should feel as proud of yourself as I feel of you.

You turned up, you stayed to the end of the class, you stepped outside of your comfort zone for a whole hour and that is not an easy thing to do.

Whatever the end result is, hold on to that, remember that, use that to find the courage to do your next class.

Confessions from a group fitness instructor

She gets up on stage, she has been studying her choreography all week, I know this she confidently whispers to herself!

She stands on that stage and stares out at the sea of expectant faces before her, in just three minutes everything she thought she had is gone.

How does this fricken release start? Are my legs wide or together? Do they know I have gone blank, why have I gone blank, why cant I remember?

Breathe damnit breath, relax she silently screams to her racing brain.

With a sudden jolt of clarity, she remembers. I remember she almost screams into the microphone.

How long have I been standing there it must have been five minutes, it’s only 30 seconds, it felt like 30 minutes.

She starts the class, no one is smiling, some look angry. Do they hate this release, do they hate me, or are they just concentrating?

Stop worrying, get back to the moment.

She smiles, she smiles from the inside out, she is on stage she is teaching body balance, she smiles and her whole body relaxes, the movements flow, she is doing what she loves.

One track after the other it seamlessly flows, then bam, deer in highlights what the frick is next, is this the new release or the old one?

Should she stay in deer in headlights pose or would some spirit fingers and interpretive dancing be better? Maybe some running man or sprinkler?

Get it together.

There we go, she is back. She comes back to the moment, if she stuffs up on one side, she will just stuff up on the other – keep it consistent and all that.

She will go back and re-learn, she will do the class next time and it will be perfect.

She continues class, can they see down my top in this pose? She lies down – darn mic belt is in the way, she moves it as daintily as she can, which isn’t very dainty at all.

Sometimes she is energised, excited and free, sometimes she is tired from multiple classes, from learning choreography, from the rest of her busy life.

She forgets her lefts and rights at times, she forgets the names of body parts, she sounds like she is trying to get the class into a giant game of twister.

She has a small class one week, and wonders what she did wrong the week before, she has a big class she feels amazing.

She is touched when she finally realizes what a positive impact she makes on some people’s lives, she is humbled and a little embarrassed when people tell her that class is the highlight of their week.

She is overjoyed that week after week, people come to her class, they are motivated and inspired by her.

Yet still she has her moments of self doubt.

She is not alone, she is human. She is a group fitness instructor, but she also is many many other things…….

20140321-152928.jpg

Lift your heart to the sunshine & let your soul shine through

20140307-091954.jpg

Beauty is 10% looks, and 90% what’s happening on the inside.

How you feel on the inside will transfer to how you appear on the outside.

When you feel a little down, rather than focus on the negatives lift your heart to the sunshine, allow your thoughts to drift to all the good and beautiful things in your life.

Watch the transformation yourself, as your soul literally shines through, you radiate happiness from the inside out!

Beautiful yes?

The greatest triumphs come with patience and dedication

This week I forced myself to slow down, to master the fine art of patience.

Patience with my practice, patience with achieving my business goals, and patience with people in my life.

20140302-074550.jpg

I taught crows pose in class, and I watched the ones who leapt into it, their impatience literally throwing them off balance and they were unable to master the pose.

20140302-074811.jpg

I watched the ones who listened who tried the pose in gradual stages, who kept trying until they got it right, it was an amazing thing to watch.

The greatest triumphs always come from practice, patience, dedication and a belief in ones self!

20140302-075029.jpg

Like a tidal wave gratitude washed over my body

If you are really lucky you will experience a few unexceptional moments in life, that feel exceptional.

Those unsuspecting moments that creep up on you out of nowhere, that send jolts of clarity and waves of happiness through your body.

This morning at 8:16am (I know, because when it hit, I looked at my watch, and made a point to capture the moment).

At 8:16am this morning, waves of gratitude crashed over my body like a tidal wave.

At 8:32 am I sit by the Brisbane River, I eat the yoghurt and banana I had prepared and I try to put into words everything that is bursting from my heart.

As I said, if you are lucky, you will experience these magical moments where you feel exactly where you are meant to be in life.

This morning I dragged my sore, tired body out of bed to teach two people Pilates in the garden. These two people I am helping improve their fitness and strengthen an injury.

This morning before 8am I had positively helped two people, what a beautiful way to start the day.

At lunch I will help 10 more, I will give them a respite from their day in the office, to breathe in the fresh air, to find 45 minutes of peacefulness and calmness in their otherwise hectic day.

Last night I pushed 35 people to their limit and challenged them mentally and physically .

This past month I have had several people cry in class, for the simple reason that for that brief moment in time they had felt the best they had done in a long time. I won’t get into the reasons why, it’s not my place, but to make someone feel good even for a moment is a rare treasure.

There are a lot of people who do amazing things in this world, being a fitness instructor may not be considered one of them, but being involved in improving someone’s state of mind in a positive way for a few moments of their life, feels pretty amazing to me.

I don’t think it matters what you are doing with your life, if you are doing something that makes your life richer, that fills you and or others with joy and happiness then you are doing what you should be doing with your life.

20140211-110138.jpg

If you feel gratitude for your life when you wake up, does it matter what life you are living in the eyes of others.

If you are walking along and you get wave after wave of happiness hit you for no particular reason then I feel you are definitely where you are meant to be, doing what you are meant to be doing.

The emotional side of exercise

It has been an oddly emotional week, for myself and others around me. I have had a few people cry in my classes and this of course has made me think more deeply about my life, and my classes.

Emotions are a funny thing, they can be pushed to the background for so long, before all of a sudden they explode when you least expect it.

Exercise releases endorphins we all know about this, it makes sense then that emotions can be released as well.

While you may feel more comfortable crying during relaxation or a hip opening yoga sequence than pumping weights or running on the treadmill, don’t be surprised if halfway mid squat you suddenly feel overcome with emotion.

Here is where all the guys are puffing their chests out saying whatever lady, well guys it happens to you too, I know this, I have seen it.

While you may disguise (or bury) it better than the ladies, it does happen to you as well 🙂

Think about it, when you are exercising, you are away from your life so to speak; no wife, husband, children, work, deadlines, chores before you – just you and your chosen exercise.

Your mind is now focussed, your breathing has most likely changed, without these other external factors what are you left with?

Your thoughts!

Your emotions!

Now for my yoga, pilates, body balance people; relaxation is confrontational, being left quietly alone with yourself and a potential racing mind can be daunting, so I am here to tell you that it is ok to feel whatever it is you are feeling.

It is ok to let some tears flow silently down your cheeks, and if you end up a blubbering puffy face mess then that is ok as well.

We tend to hold a lot of emotion in our hips, so if you are in the midst of a deep hip opening sequence then it is quite natural to start to feel an emotional release during this.

How you feel is how you feel, so recognise this, accept this and embrace it.

Release what needs to be released and I am confident you will feel a million times better for allowing yourself to do this.

20140207-165351.jpg